It’s raining outside in New York City as I sit at my favorite local coffee shop, Madame SouSou, in Astoria and write alongside a foamy cappuccino and mason jar of pink roses. As the petals fall on my keyboard, swirling around with the wind sneaking in from the front door, I find myself somewhere between nostalgic reflections of my first time solo traveling in Argentina a year before; and the nervous anticipation for my upcoming solo travels to Morocco and Vietnam later this summer and fall.
When I had first decided to solo travel to Buenos Aires last August, it was at a time in my life when everything was in transition. Summer 2014 found me at one of those crucial forks in the road where you can decide to either continue on the path you’re going down or drastically change your circumstances and take a stab at happiness. As I sat on that Buenos Aires bound flight, I began to question my sanity to solo travel. The idea of solo traveling when wistfully looking out a window and imagining far flung locales is inherently more romantic than the prosaic reality of sitting alone sans companions aboard an evening flight to a different country. Yet, solo traveling ultimately gave me unprecedented strength as I faced truths about what I want in my life, discovered overwhelming kindness from strangers and learned to love the spectrum of emotion one feels when they face themselves.
Today, solo travel is a hot topic as women around the world are flirting with the idea of visiting a country without a friend or loved one in tow. There is something idealistic and inspiring about waking up in a foreign place and having the utmost freedom to see what you want, when you please; for the Travelettes’ who are drawn to the promise that solo traveling offers, consider these tips for first time solo travelers.
1. Research your Destination
I have a love affair with spontaneity when I travel; I love serendipitous encounters, stumbling upon charming cafes and meeting people from around the world. More often than not, the best moments in travel (and life) are the ones we don’t plan for. That said, when flying solo to a new destination there is a fine line between embracing chance and being totally unprepared. When I caught a boat over to Uruguay, the lack of preparation I had done was comical! It wasn’t until my passport was stamped and I was standing on Uruguay soil did I realize I had no idea where to go, no idea where to exchange my money or how to get around. With Colonia only an hour away from Buenos Aires by ferry, it was no problem to leave so much up to chance for a short trip across the Rio de la Plata but for my arrival to Argentina from New York–that was a different story. I made sure to learn about the safer neighborhoods in Buenos Aires, the currency exchange, how to get to and from the airport and picked up advice from friends and locals who know Argentina well. I left plenty of room on my trip for whirlwind adventures and chance meetings, but I came armed with practical information on the destination I was visiting.
2. Tap into your Intuition
It’s said that women have a very keen sense of intuition and have an uncanny way to sense danger a mile away. When I was visiting the rough and tumble neighborhood of La Boca in Buenos Aires, I was advised by many to be careful. La Boca is beautiful, colorful and playful but beyond the two streets that tourists see there are dangers to be had. As I roamed through La Boca with my camera bag hoisted on my shoulders, I noticed a palpable shift in the air as I crossed over a set of train tracks and realized I was no longer in the “tourist friendly” part of town. I felt the change before I realized it and promptly turned around–knowing that nothing good lay ahead. As a first time solo traveler, my intuition was my greatest asset in throwing up red flags in situations I knew I should avoid.
3. Expect to get Lonely
There were so many beautiful moments of solo traveling that left me smiling deliriously and feeling utterly alive; yet there were inevitable moments where loneliness won out over confidence and trailed me like a debt collector. Solo traveling is an experience that reveals parts of your personality and a full spectrum of emotion in all its intricacies. As much as I learned to enjoy the moments and embrace the present, I also learned to pick myself up. The best advice I can offer first time solo travelers is to expect to get lonely at times and to embrace this emotion as you will every other thought and emotion that washes over you during your trip. There is a real power and simplistic beauty that comes from knowing you have the strength to lift your own chin up when sad, comfort yourself when lonely and keep moving forward.
4. Stay Connected to Home
There is of course an appeal to being fully submerged in your solo travel adventure, but when out there alone it is best to stay connected to friends and family back home. Whether you are uploading photos to Instagram, sharing Facebook updates on your latest passport stamp, checking in on Foursquare or simply messaging via Whatsapp–it is smart to let people know where you are and where you’re headed.
5. Enjoy the Question: “What do I want to do?”
During my stay in Argentina I met a wonderful person who left me with a simple piece of advice: Don’t ever do anything you don’t want to do. I’ve mulled these words over in my mind and realized that too often in life I tend to put myself in situations and circumstances I wish I hadn’t–whether for fear of disappointing someone or a sense of obligation. Solo traveling offers the refreshing and revolutionary freedom to ask yourself what do I want to do today? Each morning I woke up in Argentina I asked myself this question and whether I spent the day writing at my favorite cafe, jumping a last minute flight to Iguazu to see the falls or hopping a boat to Uruguay–everything I did on that trip was because I wanted to. In life, we don’t always get this freedom to choose for ourselves so savor this question, get comfortable with it and relish the endless possibilities of living life on your own terms.
6. Bring What Makes You Comfortable
As a writer I draw comfort from journals and books when I travel. My journals reflect back at me my innermost thoughts, while my books offer escape, advice or solace in harder moments. Everyday that I was out exploring, I had my Nikon and journal in my bag with me. Albeit being a small comfort, both became extensions of myself as I waded further into my solo traveling adventure. Bring what makes you comfortable.
7. Be Wary of your Surroundings
I’ll admit that when it comes to my personal belongings I’ve sometimes been a little too casual with leaving a bag next to me, leaving a purse unzipped, or leaving my camera in plain sight. On my first day in Buenos Aires, I found myself at a local bar enjoying a drink in celebration of my arrival. As I tried to get comfortable with the idea of drinking alone, I left my bag next to me with the flap thrown back and my camera exposed. I hadn’t thought twice about it because it was daytime, the bar was fairly empty and I was sitting directly next to my bag but a few moments later a local (and soon to be new friend) told me to be careful–that in a city like Buenos Aires I have to watch my surroundings. Being wary of my surroundings extended beyond watching my bag–as a solo female traveler it’s important to look around, be careful and be cautious.
8. Skip On the Cocktails
When I traveled to Panama with my girlfriends we would stay out dancing until 3 am at a local island bar in Bocas del Toro. We were all together and if one of us had overindulged in the libations, there were 5 other girls to keep an eye out and watch her back. My nights in Buenos Aires were tamer when compared to the frivolity of Bocas del Toro–unless I was meeting a friend for drinks, attending a local asado or simply having beers with travelers at my hostel–most nights proved low-key.
The truth is that solo traveling means no one else is responsible for you or your belonging but yourself. If you get lost, drink too much, get robbed or simply lose your way home you do not have a safety net of friends to defend your silver lining. Even in the evenings that I met new friends or locals for drinks, I made a point to keep my wits about me so that I was always savvy to the situation and sure I could get home safely at the end of the night. While half the fun of travel is to seize opportunities, skip on drinking to the point that you cannot take care of yourself.
9. Let Solo Traveling Change You
There is a favorite quote of mine that reads: “A ship docked in harbor may be safe but that’s not why ships are built.” It’s human nature to be cautious but life truly begins when we step outside of our comfort zones and take a chance on the unknown. Solo traveling is an experience that inspires, tests and strengthens anyone who ventures into the world alone with their thoughts. Of course there are dangers to consider and risks to keep in mind but so long as you’re savvy to the destination, aware of your surroundings and keen to you intuition–the trip has the potential to be life changing.
Thanks for some great advice! I would sure use them when I'm having my first time solo travel! Thanks for sharing!
I've been more interested in solo travel recently, as I grow older (I already love to blog about exploring the world so I'm good there), so articles like this really help me! Thanks
xx
bombshell-to-be.blogspot.com
I have been thinking about doing more solo traveling. It is very freeing to go and not feel like I am holding anyone back because I want to stop and take some photos! Also feeling like you are a part of the environment is key to a successful trip and sometimes being alone helps me to key into my surroundings. Thanks for the post!
http://www.explorercreative.com/
I love the advice about never doing anything you don't want to do ... a great motto to live life by really :)
Actually, I've been studying abroad without knowing anyone and i did an internship in Cape town as well without knowing anyone. But i was not alone at all. I just feel like solo travel means taking the plane alone as you always meet new friends :)
Actually, I’ve been studying abroad without knowing anyone and i did an internship in Cape town as well without knowing anyone. But i was not alone at all. I just feel like solo travel means taking the plane alone as you always meet new friends.
http://studentsntravelers.blogspot.com
making my first solo trip to Vietnam in just over 3 weeks and found this helpful (especially after already travelling the South American countries you've mentioned above) - great post! :)
A little dissapointed when you said you were in your favorite coffee shop ' writing ' but went on to say that a rose petal fell on your ' keyboard '. That's not writing, it's typing, which is a little different from writing.
I've been a draftsman for over 50 years and was proud of my handwriting skills until the computer came along and destroyed them. I still write as much as I can using pencil or pen but am not satisfied with the output.
Maybe age also has a bearing on it, also.
Love reading the daily blogs on ' blog login '.
That's the reason I travel with lots of handwritten books - I simply hate typing and love writing. :D I'm just a 30 something, but i dont think this will ever change. :D No blog link available from my side.
I enjoyed reading these tips. I am older and am considering my first solo trip to Paris in the fall. My family is not supportive for fear of my safety. Your thoughts on loneliness were very interesting as that is my main concern. Thanks for the good advice!
I'm in the midst of planning my very first solo adventure as a young woman, and I am LOVING this list. Especially #5. No limitations, no reservations, all individual choices. Thanks for this Nikki!
I think these tips are very useful! I found your blog today and I´m so excited to read everything from it haha. :)
Loved this article. I took my first solo trip Christmas 2014 to Rome and Paris. Half way there I had that "What the hell was I thinking" moment. Nothing that a nice cup of hot tea didn't take care of. I think it was the best trip I have ever taken and I'm not sure i will ever travel with friends or family again! JK. The freedom of making you own plans and changing this up at will was fabulous. I love taking photos...lots of them...and holding others up will I did let me get some great shots. Thanks for your insights. I would say to Beverly, I got some of the same resistance from some of my family. I never felt unsafe in Paris as long as you stay smart and be aware of your surroundings. Remind your family that in this day and age of modern technology you are just a phone call away and promise to call daily. Go and have a great time!!
I had some very similar thoughts from my first experience traveling internationally by myself to Ecuador. It always feels great to know that even when we feel alone that there are always people who will understand, if we can find them.
http://trekkinggreen.com/2015/05/8-thoughts-from-beginning-solo-travel/
Great post, I am definitely trying to live my life by not doing anything I want to do, if you don't like something the only person who has the power to change it is you
Really great article - wish I had read something like it when I took my first solo trip all those years ago!
All great points to help solo travels become of aware of their situation and how to make everything less intimidating and scary. Doing research ahead of time and just knowing your surroundings is key to feeling comfortable and enjoying yourself. I find there's always other solo travelers to befriend and connect with, which is extremely helpful.
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Very interesting to read the bit about getting lonely. I never realized this myself, but I've done a lot of solo travelling and almost always there is an hour/an evening when it happens. It's not a bad thing I find :)
Maybe another tip for some people travelling on their own is the bring a good book. I always bring my e-reader and make sure to start reading a new book I'm very exciting about on the first day of my travel. Especially if you have to spent hours waiting for connections or travelling in a plane or train or whatnot, it's a nice companion to take with you.
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I'm leaving for my first solo trip in 4 days, so this article come at the right time! :D
Love this post! I've been solo in Berlin for a little while now and loving it. Your post brings up some super valid points about exploring foreign places solo.
berlinmilch.wordpress.com
Absolutely loved this! I sat here nodding to everything you said and I enjoyed the way you all wrote it down. This article made me even more excited about my solo trip to Australia.
Hey! Thanks for this helpful post. It's my first day in Bali today (to start off my year of solo travel) and I am a little lost. I know I just need to put myself out there and learn how to live like a local and I'll be okay. This post made me feel heaps better. Cheers
thanks for sharing
This was a great read. Thank you for the helpful tips!