2017 just got a little better because soon there will be a smartphone add-on that lets you send a kiss that someone else can feel, even if they are on the other side of the world! We present: the Kissenger. Someone at the Imagineering Lab at City University London has a heart for lovers (or maybe just a long distance boy/girlfriend?) and decided to give the world this invention – a gadget designed for couples to feel more connected by being able to exchange kisses virtually. Here, we answer the million questions you must have about such a revolutionary new creation!


You say: Kissinger? Isn’t he that American politician from way back?

We say: No no no, you’re thinking of Henry Kissinger, the famed political scientist and advisor to Nixon (amongst other Republican presidents). This is the Kissenger, a little device which links up to your phone and transmits kisses across cyberspace to your loved ones in real time. It’s a lot sexier and far less likely to instigate a military coup in South America.

You say: Woah – I can kiss through the internet now? This is the future, isn’t it?

We say: It sure looks like it!

You say: So how does it work?

We say: From Kissenger’s website: “High precision force sensors are embedded under the silicon lip to measure the dynamic forces at different parts of your lips during a kiss. The device sends this data to your phone, which transmits it to your partner over the Internet in real time. Miniature linear actuators are used to reproduce these forces on your partner’s lips, creating a realistic kissing sensation. Kissenger provides a two-way interaction just like in a real kiss. You can also feel your partner’s kiss on your lips when they kiss you back.”

underwater love

You say: Holy shit.

We say: Quite.

You say: Who’s it designed for?

We say: Everyone really! It’s perfect for long-distance relationships and couples in general, or for family members who are apart for whatever reason… And the makers have also designed it as a way for celebrities to connect more, um, intimately with fans (if they so choose).

You say: So where can I get it, and how can I get started?

We say: Woah there tiger! This is still a brand new idea; the IOS app is not available yet, and the actual device is only a prototype at the moment. However you can message the team who make it here with any questions about the estimated release date and pricing.

You say: Okay. What about tongues?

We say: ….. you might be able to get an attachment for that.