“Stay true to your own nature. If you like to do things in a slow and steady way, don’t let others make you feel as if you have to race. If you enjoy depth, don’t force yourself to seek breadth.” ~ Susan Cain
Photo by Jason Briscoe via Unsplash
I’ve always been the quiet one. And for a lot of my life this seems to have been a great disadvantage. I’ve had countless people telling me to ‘come out of my skin’ or to ‘liven up’ when the truth is, I am an introvert and I am comfortable in my skin as I am. I like being alone, and I also like being with other people. But I find my time to recharge through writing, taking photos or being out in nature. Introversion often has a bad rap, being labeled as shy, anti-social, or worst of all, boring. For many of us however, boring is the last thing we are. Introverts often have many complex layers, it just might not be obvious on first glance what they are.
Since I started travelling solo however, I have in general been tremendously glad of my introversion. The way I am by nature has hugely contributed to the way I travel. Being an introvert has allowed me to see places in a way others might not. Exploring alone has opened up interactions with local people, getting up early instead of partying every night has led me to morning markets and empty beaches, and avoiding big groups of loud backpackers has led me to local food joints and secret destinations. Sure, there have definitely been times where I have wished I was more of an extrovert, but in general, travel has made me much more comfortable in my own introverted skin.
In the end, there is no right way or wrong way to travel. It is your journey and you take it as you wish it to be. But here are some of the ways in which being an introvert has allowed me to travel better.
I watch and listen, and notice things others might miss
This is something I noticed quickly when I started travelling solo. I prefer to explore a new place alone, quietly, slowly and with both eyes watching the world. I find I often see things that others don’t, whether that’s some amazing street art, a smile from a local child, a narrow doorway leading to some amazing local food, or simply the colours of a sunset.
For me, exploring and creating go hand in hand
There are only so many hours in a day, and only so many days on the road. I choose to spend mine seeing everything I can. I want to find the depth of a country, meet its people, explore its markets and cities and villages, hike the hills and swim through secret lakes and beaches. In my down-time I edit photos and write to recharge. All in all, there’s just not enough hours in a day to spend all evening socialising and all morning in bed hungover.
I’m super comfortable travelling solo and going off the beaten track
When I started travelling, I would follow the tourist trail. I went through South East Asia visiting the Thai ‘party’ islands and hill side backpacker retreats. I had lots of fun, and met lots of people, but I couldn’t help feeling like there was more to a destination than these towns and islands full of British and Australian backpackers. I also got completely exhausted with constantly being around the same kind of people, being asked the same questions again and again.
So I got off the beaten track, and it was only then that I really found my travel mojo. I am most comfortable in the weird places. The places where there’s not a single bar in town, where there’s no English breakfast on any menu and the beaches aren’t full of neon paint and forgotten flip flops the next morning. I’m comfortable going to that remote Burmese town and not finding a single other foreigner there. I am happy taking an 88 hour train across Russia with not another English speaker in sight. I recharge in these places, I thrive and I create. For me, this is what travel is about. Getting to truly know a place, while also getting to truly know yourself.
Photo by Simon Schmitt via Unsplash
I get up earlier and see more by exploring alone
I have a very vivid memory of turning up in the beautiful Vietnamese town of Hoi An, and having realised that I accidentally booked a bed in a party hostel. I arrived in the mid-afternoon to a room full of hungover gap-year kids and a pool side scene of cheap beer being drunk by very loud topless boys playing very loud dance music. Some people would have loved it, but for me, it was quite simply my idea of hell. That night there was a huge party going on nearby, a party by backpackers for backpackers.
I passed, and the next day I got up at dawn, borrowed a bicycle and cycled to an early morning market, photographed fishermen as they brought their morning catch in from the sea and then headed to the old town, for a whole day of exploring one of South East Asia’s most beautiful and well preserved old cities. I explored alone all day, yet my heart was full of love from the locals I met, and my head full of the knowledge I had gained from this town, and from the creativity needed to inspire my photographs. I wouldn’t have traded that for any interaction with a group of English backpackers; after all, I can do that back in England!
I trade hostels for local guesthouses and home stays
Since experiences like the one above, I now very rarely stay in a hostel, and if I do, I choose it wisely. Instead, I look for local guesthouses and home stays. Places I can have real interactions with local people and perhaps find a few other solo travellers too. This has led me to many wonderful situations and places, and I also often find these places to be more comfortable and often cheaper.
Photo by Sofia Sforza via Unsplash
I don’t meet and bond with many people, but when I do, they are friends for life
As an introvert, I don’t strike up conversations with every single person I meet in a hostel or on a day trip, but occasionally I’ll meet someone who I really connect with. Perhaps another introvert with a love for the world, the desire to have a meaningful conversation and who wants to come sunrise exploring with me. When I do, I savour these people, spend days or weeks with them and they often become friends for life.
Travel and introversion led me to my passion and profession
When I first started travelling, being shy led me to seeing my camera as my best friend. I became fascinated with capturing life and places through a lens, and the interactions it brought into my life. Fast forward a few years, and I am now a professional travel photographer and writer. I tell stories about people and places and that all started with an introverted girl who picked up a camera.
If you’re an introvert, don’t feel like you have to blend in. Follow your heart and your passion and who knows where it might take you!
Are you an introvert? Do you find it makes you a better traveller?
I resonate with this post so well. Like you, being an introvert has allowed me to develop my passion - for me, it's writing!
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
http://charmainenyw.com
I have never related to an article as much as I do with this one! I am an introvert myself. Those comments "open up a little" or "don't always be so shy" have accompanied me throughout almost all my life, especially in school but also in my family. My mother and my older brother are both rather extroverts while my dad had been introvert as well. I got that from him I guess.
For me it often takes long time to make friends because I am not one open for small talk. I prefer to really get to know people, talking about their passions, telling them about mine. Sharing our dreams and ideas.
My best friend is just as introverted as I am, or maybe even a bit more than I am, and we get along so well because we understand each other. Even with little to no words. Sometimes we spend time on Skype (I live in Germany and she lives in England) and while doing that there can pass by an hour both of us simply listening to music or watch a movie "together" and not having to speak at all and it doesn't feel awkward. It feels right. Because (especially due to the relatively long distance between us) for us it is more important to see each other rather than talk the night away. Which we also do often. But yeah, we both often just enjoy each other's silent company even via Skype.
Travelling is my biggest passion, just as photography and writing is. It gives me time to relax and fully enjoy life. And after reading this article I feel like that's the most normal thing to do. To travel alone with the freedom of seeking company whenever I wish to and not being forced into company.
Thank you so much for this article. :)
I love this so much. I'm an introvert and sometimes I struggle with not connecting or feeling like I'm not doing it right by joining the partying in the hostel. But like you, I much prefer seeing things my own way. Doing things my own way. Getting up early and being alone. Thank you for the reminder that it's a good thing.
This is one of the most inspirational texts about travelling I've ever read...
I absolutely LOVE your article.
Even though i am much more an extrovert than in introvert person,
i do understand you fully.
Sometimes i caught myself while travelling with the urge of being surrounded
by other people, especially after travelling with some friends for a while.
But each time i step out of my comfort zone (which is in my case being with people)
and i go out, allone, explore, miss the party but see the sunrise; it gives me way
more than these often quit superficial evening with random people.
Also, as you said aswell, going your own way and being allone often guides you
to more interesting, like minded people.
Thank for this article, it was quit an inspiration to start exploring more
on my own again, to step out of my habit.
Great story! Well written, I could not have said it better myself. :)
I am an introvert as well and I like to be around people, but it takes a lot of energy out of me.
x
Looks like you are describing myself :) I am a proud introvert! About hostels, I just spent 2 nights at a hostel in Rio (just because it was close to a place I was visiting for a professional course), and I regret until today...Loud music, party all night (right in front my single room window), and I had to hear a guy telling to another one he doesn´t understand why I spent both night locked on my room instead socializing with the other travellers...
Hi, I enjoyed reading your story a lot. It reminds me of something I did. Four years ago when I was 24, I walked to Santiago de Compostella, a three-month hike which I did alone. The first month and a half I met few people, approximately 6 a day and of course the locals of the guesthouses where I stayed. I loved every minute of it. When I left France and continued in Spain, everything changed. As I hiked in the Pyrenees I met a local couple and I decided to hike downwards with them, afterwards they invided me for a drink with their family in a local bar. After that I went to look for a place to stay, in Spain there are not many guesthouses on the Camino Francés so I stayed in a refugee for pilgrims. There were groups of backpackers everywhere starting their hike there. I have never felt so scared and alone as that very moment. I wasn't used to seeing that amount of people in just one day. They talked to me and I talked back, but the connection was very hard to find. They were also just starting their hike, I was already hiking for almost two months, so I felt peace and quiet inside of me... maybe it was the excitement that made them so loud, but I needed my own space.
Thank you for sharing your story, I felt a bit bizare back then, now I know that there are different types of travellers. And that I don't have to be a party girl and try to fit in. I can be my silent self and have incredible conversations with the most interesting people you can ever meet. Thanks for letting me share my thought on this subject. Hope my English writing is okay. ;)
Oh and one of the two men gave me a city tour on his scooter in Bourgos a few days later. He had given me his number for when I arrived there so he could show me the city properly.
Love Layla
I'm also an Introvert-Writer, However, a Very Different Personality From 'Regular Introverts'- (I think So, Anyway.) Aren't too Many Introverts Out There Similar to Me.☺
I'm a Night Owl and Altho I *do
(for the sake of Appearances), "Appear" to be an " Early Birdee Day Riser", it's Only That I've Already Been Awake all Night Long.☺ Being a Night Owl is Perfect for Me as an Introvert. Plenty of Quiet Stillness For Research, Thinking and Writing.
I'm now 56 and have had This Night Owl Propensity Since age 16. Daughter is same way.
Also, I Have One Brother Out of Five of us Siblings-(I'm The Baby) The Rest of Siblings are All Early Birdees. Even (The One) Brother is More of a Dayshift Person than I Could Ever Be. He's on Swingshift.
There Are Extrêmes of Personality Even in The Introvert World.
Few are On My Particular Path.
It enabled me to attend College University Full-time on Day shift and Work 12-14 Hour NightShifts full-time.
Seemingly an Impossible Task to Work Full-time and Do College Schedules Full-time at the same time.
I Carried a 4.0- Straight A's all during College. (Science Major.)Just thought I would mention what is Possible Out There on This Particular Shift & Schedule. ☺Depends on How Bad You Want it, That's All.
While I have always been considered an extrovert, I think I've become more introverted as I've gotten older and been on my own for a long time. I can completely relate to what you say about enjoying the time to yourself as you explore a new place and connect with the locals. Like you I am a photographer and writer (and a travel agent) so I relish those times when it's just me and my camera. Thanks for sharing this post!
I'm an introvert as well but I always loooved going on day travels by myself when I was travelling!
x Annabelle
travelsandtea.com
For a completely unique experience should visit different countries. This is why i love travelling.
A well written article, which I can completely relate to. Thank you for writing this!
Ahhh this post gives me so much feels! I love it so much Im cryin. I can totally relate and this is such an inspiration! Thanks for this post.
Xx Nikaia
www.wheresnika.com
I loved this post.. I am a huge introvert. I love people, but am perfectly content with being alone. My family has a hard time understanding that and often push me do try and find people to do things with. I am starting my traveling and can't wait to be a solo travel.
I totally agree with you. I am a introvert. Travelling " I get up earlier and see more by exploring alone" and "I don’t meet and bond with many people, but when I do, they are friends for life". As a Brazilian, it's a must to like noise and crowd places, as Carnaval is. This year I will travel alone to Europe from the beginning of Carnaval (Feb 24th) to middle of March.
I would recommend introverts go on tour holidays if possible. I went through California with Topdeck last year and was worried because I like parties, but not every night! Sometimes I want to just explore. But going on a tour was a really great balance. I would wake up early every morning so my room mate always got up! I would go to bed earlier than her, but she would sneak in and never disturb me. My extroverted friend would drag me to bars and start conversations with strangers, while my introverted nature would lead us towards random places. I had the most random but perfect Las Vegas experience because of this introverted / extroverted mix.
"I don’t meet and bond with many people, but when I do, they are friends for life"- this is my favorite, its easy to get down when not meeting making a lot of friends traveling but we can't forget that we just have less tolerance for the superficial and want authentic relationships. I related to this a lot
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This is so relateable. This is my favorite article I've read on this site yet!
Very relateable! I love exploring on my own pace, but I get a lot of weird looks from people when I tell them I love being on my own while travelling. I always felt a bit 'strange' for that. Happy to read that I'm not alone in this!
I am so glad to have read this article! I can really relate to it and it's nice to read in the comments that I am not the only one. Being an introvert and not really fitting in was though on me until a few years ago, but travel made me feel more self-confident. I love the quote as well; Susan Cain's book is amazing.
I am also an introvert and I totally agree with everything you wrote! I think we tend to see more and experience things deeper than others - making traveling such a rich experience for us!